Because I was feeling down. In fact, I had been feeling this way since last Monday night.

Looks like someone really got hurt here.

What would you do to make someone move on? I believe there is always more than one approach, but sometimes, you just gotta weigh the outcome/consequences.

Even if you want someone to move on, there is no need to say hurtful words. Words that he/she would never forget.

And what’s the use of apologizing after hurting someone? If you really treasure the r/s, I guess you wouldn’t even think about hurting him/her.

Perhaps that is the difference between me, and someone else. So you can bear to say those words to hurt me, but dare not do the same to someone else.

OK, I get it, got it, gotten it.

***

On a side note, I spent almost $300 on footwear today. Got myself a 2nd pair of Onitsuka Tiger and a pair of Birkenstock.

Early birthday present to myself. Haha.. every year, I never fail to buy something for myself in the month of May.

Retail therapy is indeed therapeutic, and… fun. Even if it’s done alone, I never feel lonely.

I just succumb to temptation more easily, that’s all.

Meanwhile, the target to get the Rolex on my wrist by Dec 2011 might have to be placed on hold… because I’m planning to go to Europe next year!

It depends… it’s an “either… or…” case, don’t think I’ll do both unless I’m feeling rich. Haha.

Alright, tired already. Time for a nap.

Knowing that I’m usually game for anything, but this time round, I guess I can only help out a little. More often than not, the groom has to do more work if he wants to get the bride! Nevertheless, I’m sure it’s gonna be fun to be part of the wedding entourage.

Seeing close friends of mine get married really makes me feel really excited and happy for them, even as I’m typing away at this moment right now. I’ve always liked weddings, because it’s a joyous occasion! It need not be very grand, and yet fun and enjoyable. So the question of that day was “How do you know he/she is The One?”. The answer given by the wife-to-be was really simple – “Consistency”. It then made me ponder a little. How does the “consistency” of one get evaluated?

I’d like to think that every woman, no matter at which stage of her life, would always enjoy the feeling of being wooed. Of course, treating the lady right and accommodating to her needs and wants would be a nice thing to do, but will things change after the guy gets the girl? It’s been said oh-so-often that whenever a guy is going after a girl, he’d do anything; but after he gets her, he’d do nothing.

Oh well, I guess that’s prolly true, but only to a certain extent… because it really depends if the both parties are willing to put in (possibly, more) effort in maintaining the relationship and to keep the sparks going every now and then. Of course, I’m not talking about showering the girl with tangible items like gifts all the time.

For the guy’s part, it’s prolly about the emotional support; being there for her when she needs someone, and of course pleasing the girl, knowing what she likes and planning something different once in a while, and the list goes on. It’s non-exhaustive, really. But whether you’re dating or married, I guess it all works pretty much the same.

Surprises would be good, but of course, the efforts shouldn’t be discounted in any sense. If a guy really wants a girl to be happy, I reckon he’d do everything within his ability to do so. Even simple things like making an impromptu/spontaneous decision to visit somewhere she likes or wants to go to wouldn’t be too bad a choice either.

IMO, things shouldn’t change even after they get together (after the hanging out / dating phase and officially become an item), or for those attached, moving on to the next milestone in life – getting hitched. While I might not be sure which context “consistent” is being used here for the case of my friend, I sincerely wish him all the best!

***

Sometimes, it’s not about the destination. Whether we get there or not doesn’t really matter anymore. So long as you know where I’m coming from, I’m contented.

Initially, I couldn’t comprehend it totally too. Maybe my comprehension sucks, but I’d like to think that that’s not the case. Back then, to me, love = in love – It was as simple as ABC or the basic arithmetic of 1 + 1 = 2. Or maybe guys tend to have selective hearing. As with having “selective memory”, a person with selective hearing chooses what he wants to hear, or what he does not want to hear.

In this particular scenario, when faced with a girl who says this line, a guy would normally perceive it as “I love you, but I’m not in love with you”; hence the comprehension, or rather, the lack of it. Loving someone comes in many forms. I love my friends, yes, both male and female friends. I love my family. I love my job. Ok, that aside, I do love people around me, in general.

But it doesn’t mean that I’m in love with my friends or my family members (that sounds… sick). Loving my friends and family members can simply be shown by being there for them whenever they need somebody, showering care and concern on them whenever they are sick or in good health and many other methods. Being loved is a very fortunate thing to happen to someone and I guess it takes a lot of courage to want to love too.

By wanting to love, you’re opening your heart and exposing yourself to possible hurt, heartbreaks, exploitations or even betrayals. Now you see why a lot of courage is needed? In a nutshell, you have to let go of yourself if you want to love, which I guess, when most people do, it is a good thing. But, being in love, over here, is a different ball game.

Splitting the line into two parts, let’s begin to analyse them.

The first – “I love you”. Sounds simple enough? Think again. As mentioned above, these magical words can come in different context; and the more common one would be between couples. Let’s take a breather here and move on to the second part.

“… but I’m not in love with you”. The word, “but”, as seemingly harmless as it might be, is actually the most important word of the entire line. Whatever came before “but”, is probably just sugar-coated words, to ease the pain of the truth which actually comes right after it. That is, “I’m not in love with you”.

Simply put, the girl/guy doesn’t love you (anymore).

Still don’t get it?

Then let me attempt to paraphrase the entire line of “I love you, but I’m not in love with you”.

How does “I CARE about you, but I’m NOT EXCITED about you” sound? Caring reflects concern, but it’s certainly different from love. Getting excited could be good, but then again, it does not necessarily show love as well. It’s just another… expression, another feeling.

Love is something which we articulate not through words, but actions. It is a verb and not a feeling which you get from others. It is an experience which you get from the deeds you do for another person.

Hmmm but that’s just what I think and I stand to be corrected.

I’d think that this friend of mine is a giver too, but perhaps sometimes, a relationship doesn’t work this way. In life, and in love, giving your all doesn’t mean you’d be able get what you deserve, or rather, what you think you deserve. While I know he’s feeling really sad and is in fact trying hard to move forward, I also know it’s tough to do so.

I forgot where I read this, and I don’t know if it’s true – Typically, for every one year you’re in a relationship, you’d need a month to get over it. But I have got friends who never really gotten over their past relationships, even after years. People who live in the past are allowing themselves to wallow in self-pity and will never grow to become stronger.

I just hope that my friend can move on soon enough though.

It was really fun and awesome! In the morning, I met my date at Mandarin Gallery and took her to Wild Honey. People say honey is sweet, but I’d say wild honey is sweeter. We arrived at 11-ish in the morning and saw a queue outside the restaurant. Expectedly, we had to join the queue and waited for almost half an hour before we got a table.

Wild Honey is situated in the corner of level 3 in Mandarin Gallery; not a very big place to dine at, but it’s cosy enough, I guess. With its warm lighting and the setting of the restaurant, it somehow gives me a feeling of having brunch overseas. My date ordered a set of English breakfast, and myself, the European breakfast, complete with a cup of hot chocolate each. The serving was huge for the English breakfast, which consists of creamy scrambled eggs, pork sausage, sauteed mushrooms, dad’s baked beans, bacon and vine ripened tomato with toasted brioche. It’s awesome. My European breakfast wasn’t too bad either, albeit a rather small serving, judging from the size of my… stomach. :X

I had two eggs benedict with sauteed mushrooms and prosciutto on toasted homemade brioche and hollandaise sauce… and I’m craving for it now. I should just stop ranting and imagine the sight of the food.

As we had a movie to catch, we left briefly after we completed brunch, as satisfied customers, of course. Red Riding Hood is a thriller which kept viewers in suspense and wonder who the werewolf was, but I felt that the movie ended rather abruptly. In any case, it’s still a good movie to watch. =)

My date and I then went to Chinatown in search for some stuff, but apparently, we didn’t manage to get what we wanted. We walked along the streets of Chinatown, as we chatted and we found ourselves at Hachi Tei, located along Telok Ayer Street. But it was closed for business until 6pm before it opens for dinner. So I suggested going to P.S. Café at Ann Siang Hill instead, as it’s the only place with air-con and serves pretty decent food.

Chatting over food and desserts seems to be what most Singaporeans like to do and I guess most people would agree with me that it’s a slack and relaxing way to while the afternoon away. However, if food, or the lack of, is not a concern, activities like walking along beaches, taking long walks and watching the sunset can be just as enjoyable too, if the company is right.

We walked all the way from Ann Siang Hill to Liang Seah Street where we had steamboat for dinner and headed to Beaver’s for some drinks.

The night ended well.

While there are times when I don’t mean what I say, just like a woman; there certainly are times where I’m serious and mean every single word that I said. How’d you know if I’m serious or not? That’s for you to find out.

But if I did or said something wrong, please let me know… because I wanna understand. Just because I don’t say a thing, doesn’t mean that I don’t care or don’t want to know.

This is definitely one of my favourite songs by him, apart from his rendition of ”Sorry That I Loved You”.

There was a wide spread of food served in buffet style but I guess it wasn’t enough to go around for 500 (?) people * > 2 rounds? The weather was pretty kind to not rain and there was actually a fireworks display to end the D&D. How cool is that?

Anticipating the start of fireworks has always been something really exciting to me, and as far as this excitement is concerned, I’d very much like to share it with someone special. Fireworks are very beautiful, but it’s a shame that it doesn’t last for too long before it turns into smoke. Oh well *shrugs*

On a side note, work has been fine for me so far, and I’m finally back to the Muay Thai gym in Katong after a long hiatus. It’s nice to see the trainers still working there and they recognize me! It’s like returning to a small family after a few years of not seeing each other. Anyway, I took up this self-training package at $200 for 3 months, which I thought was a pretty good deal since I’d have full access to the boxing gym facilities, w/o someone to train me though. That’s why it’s a “self-training” package.

I’m happy doing my skipping, shadow boxing and bag work and I can certainly do them alone. It’s gonna serve as a good stress-buster from work and the many problems in life which I might potentially face. While it might be seen as others to be a form of escapism, I’d beg to differ.

Exercising releases endorphins which, in turn, produce a really calm and zen feeling within you, post-workout, that is. It clears your mind and helps you think better and perhaps problems which might seem unsolvable initially might have a solution afterall!

Apart from work, I guess I still (thankfully) lead a pretty routine life with the occasional KTV sessions and/or dinner with friends, and recently we’re talking about $ and women (again). HAHA.. what else can men talk about? Zzz. Pretty much boring topics, but friends around us are getting married one by one!

While I feel happy for them from the bottom of my heart, sometimes, I tend to wonder if I’d be able to settle down early like them, too. Hmmm… still pretty far.

Nevertheless, while the few of us aren’t exactly looking around, we won’t discount the chance/probability of getting to know someone from the opposite gender better. Haha, and by the way, SDN has sent me a few letters and even some dating magazines! Just this morning, I received a card-holder from them… I was like, “Ok, so what do I use it for? Collect name cards of potential dates or simply put, women whom I got to know?” Haha..

But it’s still pretty nice of them to send to their members the more… practical stuff.

Alright, time to log off! Till the time I update again!

I’m currently counting down to my upcoming trip to Hong Kong next Sunday! I’m just 10 days away and it feels so surreal. I’ll be going on this trip together with Xin Jin, and I’m sure it’s gonna be fun with all the food and *gasps for air* SHOPPING!!!

My last visit to Hong Kong was more than three years back in December 2007.  While the trip was fun, it was also through this trip did my Dad realise he’s got some health problems. Oh well, it’s a blessing in disguise, or so to speak.

I’m so gonna raid the outlet stores over there and hopefully they have stuff which I like… otherwise, I don’t think I’ll buy them But before that, I have to get a new luggage and I’m gonna get it today.

Ok, my mind is a blank now. Haha.. anyway, I’ve already made up my mind to pick up Muay Thai once more. I’ve been learning Muay Thai since 2006? Or was it 2007? But I stopped for a while in 2008/9 when I decided to concentrate on my final year modules and FYP.

Then I entered the workforce and really had no time for it. Now that I have a little bit more of work-life balance, I think I can handle at least 2 sessions of Muay Thai a week – once on a weekday and once on a weekend. But I need a new set of gloves and hand wrap, as the leather is peeling off my old pair and I threw it out. $_$

But nevertheless, I do think it’s gonna be $ well-spent as I get to do what I like and I will get fitter (hopefully)!